Follow the flowers

Auroville Today: How did this project come about? 

Serena: Danielle wanted to make a film about death. She is a Friend of Auroville who spends half the year in France and the other half in Auroville. So she realised she had a 50% chance of passing away in Auroville, and she wanted to explore what that could mean. She really liked what she learnt about Auroville in this regard and asked if I would make this film with her after she met me and saw my work.

At first, we wanted to look into the logistics, speaking to the Farewell Group which organizes cremations and burials in Auroville, and looking at the practical steps involved with death in Auroville. But that got quite complicated. So rather than filming a lot of Farewell’s work, which in any case was difficult to get permission for and was obviously a sensitive topic, the idea progressed to interviewing Aurovilians, seeing what death meant to them and their interpretations. Initially, Danielle didn’t want to be on camera, but I wanted this film to be an investigative documentary of her exploring this subject of death in Auroville, and eventually she agreed.  

Is there a unique approach to dying in Auroville? 

I think there is. There is definitely a consensus (in the interviews) of something higher here. People do believe in the divine, having faith in that. Death is not just the end of the story, particularly for the Aurovilians. 

Funerals in Auroville are contemplative, silent, less mournful and a bit more joyful than is usual elsewhere. Each funeral is unique; yet there are similarities because there is a very strong energy. 

Flowers are a very strong symbol, bringing us back to our roots, to being in India where flowers are significant, and to Mother who gave them a lot of significance. The way we follow the flowers to the funerals – in mass bulletins we even write ‘follow the flowers’ to announce funerals -  is a very beautiful part of the Auroville ceremony.

In Auroville we are strongly influenced by Mother’s suggestions that we give time for the soul to adjust to its new reality before being cremated.  

From my understanding, it depends on the consciousness of the person. It’s not a set deadline, not one or seven days. Reading Mother, she let each one take the time they needed. She had that power to see and to allow that time and space. I was reading that some people are in sudden shock, and Mother saw these people at night who didn’t know they had passed on and thought they were alive. If they are then cremated straight away, it’s a double shock, as they don’t have time to understand what’s happened to them. 

There was a moving part in the film where both Frederick and Raman spoke of losing their sons. 

I could feel the sorrow and heaviness. Faith stood out more than anything else. Their sons are still here and are living in a different form; nothing is lost. The main thing is that having faith opens up all possibilities and allows for so much more.

In the film you explore the difference between how we deal with dying and death in India and in the West.

From my own experience of being brought up in the UK, with the stiff upper lip mentality and not showing emotions, when I first witnessed an Indian funeral, especially in Edyanchavadi, it was quite a shock to see the mourning, how loud it was, how much of a show it was. This is what is done for around a week, and then it stops, and one can move on. Whereas in the UK, there is not really this expression or release. Grief stays in the body, or grieving is done in private, and there is more of a ‘good face’ in public. It’s healthy to get it out rather than grieve for a very long time with no chance to express it. It’s been a learning experience for me. 

The day I first met Danielle, one of my closest friends died in the UK. This felt like such a sign and was a good chance to study what Sri Aurobindo and Mother taught. My friend was in poor health for quite some years. I was there in the hospital before she passed, and I questioned her quality of life, whether it should be prolonged. I still question the use of technology and where to draw this line.

How we die is an important theme in the film. 

When we pass, the environment has a key role in giving us the space to transform. For me, I would rather be in a natural environment surrounded by friends and family and held in a beautiful space, to allow the passing to the next phase. Whereas being in a clinical environment with machines, sometimes family members are not allowed in. 

When the heart beat has stopped, we need to allow space and time to adjust. In a clinical situation there is rushing and the next person who needs a bed or room. Those situations don’t allow for transformation. Stress continues into death.  

One of the aspects that struck me about Auroville funerals is the organic nature, the ingredients used in cremation – ghee, straw, wood – and also the pace that allows the ceremony to emerge naturally. 

I feel that Auroville funerals give space for really being in tune with the energy, consciousness and coming from the heart, rather than the more structured ‘western’ approach. We just do what we have to do, in silence and in that energy, to be a channel for something more, to help guide the person passing to move on. Each funeral is different, depending on the person who we are supporting at that time. 

Of all the interviewees, which ones touched you the most? 

Dr Uma was a very powerful interviewee, and it was touching the way she became emotional [about the problematic nature of death in hospital settings, eds]. I spoke out in that interview. In most of the other interviews, it was Danielle speaking. But with Dr Uma, I felt compelled to ask questions about medicine, technology and the atmosphere. 

I always find it powerful to speak with Frederick. Because he met Mother, I feel the energy of Mother come in very strongly. He made a point about not using the word ‘death’ and changing our language to reflect this.