Swadharma students speak of their experience

The Swadharma programme brings in groups of young adults to help them find their unique gifts, or their swadharma. Watching the final presentation by students of the January 2017 programme, I was struck by the diverse styles of storytelling. Clearly, this was an interesting group of people, and I decided to meet them to understand the Swadharma programme through their eyes.

Diverse backgrounds

The participants for Swadharma 2017 came from extremely diverse backgrounds. Meedhu trained to be a journalist and worked for some time with The Hindu, but was disillusioned with the lack of ethics in journalism. She had always loved performing arts and moved to an NGO that taught ballet to HIV positive and street-rehabilitated children.

Ishan, on the other hand, was a capital markets trader working with interest rates in Brazil. Gaurav is a graphic artist and Ayush works as a software engineer. What happens when you put such different people together in an intensive experiential learning programme?

For Ashwin, the biggest asset of the programme was the “extraordinarily talented” group of participants. “60% of my learning was from my peers,” says this young Indian Institute of Technology (IIT) graduate who has been on two other yatras, or learning journeys. It was on one of these other yatras through Himachal Pradesh in 2012 that he met Siddharth, who joined him in Swadharma 2017.

The Auroville experience

For Isaac, who has never stepped out of Hyderabad, Auroville is a dream come true. There is a tattoo on his arm that he got two years ago, which shows mountains and forests – a reminder that he needs to be in nature, not in a city. “This is where I belong,” he says. I am curious about another tattoo further up his arm, which shows a cross and a crown of thorns. It’s a reminder of when he was an orthodox Christian. He’s moved on since then, not willing to live in constant sin. “I want an uncomplicated life,” he says. He wants to be himself, do what moves him, and not worry about too much else. He thinks Auroville might be the perfect place for him.

Like Isaac, Ayush has always lived in one place – Cochin. He had thought about ideal societies, but had brushed them aside as childish dreams. He finds some parts of those dreams reflected in Auroville. He is fascinated by the PTDC experiment and cannot believe that it works without enforcement. He is a big fan of Mitra hostel and sees it as a microcosm of Auroville and a window into Auroville for new volunteers.

For many participants, the favourite part of the programme is meeting Aurovilians and hearing their stories. Meeting people who are passionately living their swadharma makes the programme come alive. They find it truly inspiring that such a diverse group of people could be living in harmony.

Participants also notice challenges in Auroville. Looking for a place to eat lunch on her first day here, Meedhu met a woman from a neighbouring village who took her home for a meal. But she instantly felt the tension between local Tamilians, like her host, who are employed in Auroville and Auroville residents. When she talked about this with Aurovilians, she was told that the villagers do not fully understand the ideals of Auroville. She is still wondering if there is more to that story than just ideals.

Programme feedback

For most participants, Swadharma has the right mix of structure and flexibility. The morning sessions of yoga and Awareness Through the Body (ATB), and the evening journal writing provided a consistent framework of exploration and articulation. At the same time, the programme has enough time and opportunity for thinking and introspection. The Facilitators were always available for discussion and for counseling. “There is a well-defined process of introspection and reflection,” says Ishita.

“ATB was the most awesome thing that happened to me,” says Sushmitha, in her characteristic high-energy, super-fast speech delivery. This was after a full day of ATB in the Tibetan Pavilion, a full day of guided meditation and listening to the ‘inner GPS’. She learned to remember feelings and notice changes. And this ability to notice changes might be the most important thing she is taking away from the programme.

“The journey has been very meaningful,” says Ishan, who has discovered the spiritual side of himself that he had not acknowledged before. He likes this new amalgam of scientific temper and spirituality.

Gaurav talks about the underlying elements of the programme that are not always talked about. For example, the idea of beauty. He sees beauty in the programme in the way things are done, the way flowers are arranged and how a plate of salad is prepared. This insight, that beauty is not just ornamentation, is an important learning for him.

Some participants felt that there needed to be a little more exploration of the ideas of Sri Aurobindo and The Mother. In many of their interactions with Aurovilians, they heard references to the foundational philosophy, but did not quite understand the linkages. At the same time, the session in Savitri Bhavan on the topic was not particularly popular, so there might be a need to inject some creativity into a topic that can quickly become very heavy and didactic.

Impact of Swadharma

“I feel much more confident after Swadharma,” says Siddharth. His confidence was especially low after two failed start-up attempts. That was on the back of an unfulfilling engineering job with a mining company, writing the entrance exam for the Indian Institutes of Management and deciding not to join, and dropping out after going through the seven-day selection process for the Indian Air Force. Siddharth feels he can be himself now, without worrying about what others might think. A few days after the programme ended, Siddharth went to meet some friends in Chennai. Sitting with them in their hostel room, he decided to practice mindfulness, something he had learned in Swadharma. He was aware of everything around him – everyone’s voices, the sound of the fan, the noise of traffic – and his own responses to questions he was asked. “It was a wonderful experience,” he recalls.

For Neha, the change was felt at a very deep level. Coming from Jhunjhunu, a small town in Rajasthan, Neha had withdrawn into herself. For the past few months, she had not spoken with anyone, not even her parents. “I could not imagine a place like this existed,” she says, where she is not judged, but accepted as she is. She wants to stay much longer in Auroville, learning and growing into her confident self.

For many participants, Swadharma was the first time that they connected with their spiritual dimension. Isaac had never done yoga or meditation. Siddharth was always rational. And Gaurav considers himself an agnostic. But each of them had a profound experience that opened new possibilities. “I can feel the energy of people around me and my intuition is more dominant now,” says Gaurav, not quite sure what the new experiences mean.

And what about finding that true calling? Is Swadharma helping people find their paths? Meedhu already knew she wanted to work in the performing arts, particularly in theatre and dance. But what she learned in Swadharma was the why and the how. She now knows that her art must be socially meaningful and that it must encourage and support traditional art forms and traditional knowledge.

Sometimes it is not about finding a path, but making a very significant and fundamental shift. Shivam, whose ancestral lineage includes both traders and healers, is beginning to be more “functional in society.” Widely read and deeply curious, he lived entirely in the world of ideas in his head, jealously guarding and hoarding his knowledge. The ideas discussed in Swadharma were not new to him. But he now has practical insights. And a deep desire to communicate and share his understanding.

For others, such as graphic artist Ishita, the shifts are much more subtle. She came with little expectation and found ways to be a little more comfortable in her shoes. She has always questioned her intuitions, but is now learning to trust herself. She is also learning to ask the right questions. Working on a programme on menstrual hygiene for rural girls, she realised that she doesn’t even know these little girls. Who are they? Do they even want to talk about menstruation? Who will they talk to? How will the years of prejudice be washed away in one programme session? This skill of questioning will be invaluable in her work.

Gaurav said no to a client (something he has never done before) on the second day of the programme. That must surely rank among the fastest changes ever in experiential learning. Things did become clear for him very quickly. For example, his realisation that the need to make money comes after the need for fulfilling work.

Next steps

Most of the participants are staying back in Auroville after completing the programme. Apart from just exploring the place, each one of them talked about solidifying their learnings from Swadharma. “I want to further develop myself here,” says Ishan, “before I try to transfer my learning to the external world.” He had come with the intention of getting involved in Auroville’s work, so staying back is a natural choice for him. In fact, he had worked on a business plan for a ‘library of things’ in college, so he will probably get involved in that project in Auroville.

Others are planning to stay for a few weeks and see how things work out. Some have clear ideas of where they will work, while others want to explore a wide range of activities. For Gaurav, a lot depends on his own effort. So, he is going to give himself time and experiment.

This idea of Auroville as a protected place where one can experiment and learn is echoed by almost everyone. And so is the risk of moving out before they have had a chance to ingrain their new habits. As Ishita puts it, “Will it last outside the bubble?” Does this mean that the Swadharma programme needs to be longer? The 2017 programme is a week longer than the 2016 version, but is the five-week programme long enough to create lasting change?

The previous group of participants

Going through a programme like Swadharma is always going to be energizing for young people. But does the effect last beyond the few weeks of the programme itself? To try and answer this question, I caught up with the five Swadharma participants from the 2016 group who have stayed back in Auroville.

Garima found her purpose through Swadharma and continues to follow it by working with waste materials. For Siddharth, it’s not one thing he has found, but the focus is much sharper now with fewer distractions. Also, the peer learning and group bonding that emerged in 2016 continues to this day and is a source of tremendous support. For Som, Swadharma was the most intensive programme she had attended. “The feeling is still there,” she says.

But staying with the habits is not easy. “There was a push from the programme,” says Pranit, but now that there are no structures and habits such as journal writing have fallen by the wayside.

Their perception of Auroville also has changed somewhat. Aishwarya, who now works with Earth & Us, thinks that the Swadharma program pushed open doors in Auroville. But once she was out of the programme and “merely a volunteer,” residents are no longer as open and welcoming.

Being a volunteer, it turns out, is not so easy in Auroville. There are challenges with housing, expenses and community interactions. One participant even reported an Aurovilian saying that volunteers are the worst things to happen in Auroville. Another challenge that seems to come up often is the unstated but powerful role of hierarchy in Auroville organisations and units.

“But in spite of all this, I feel at home here,” says Divyanshi. She wasn’t even planning to stay back after Swadharma, but has stayed for five months now. Her true Swadharma journey started after the programme.

Would they change anything in the programme itself? Most of the earlier group of participants felt that the way people are evaluated needs to be a little more open and flexible. Also, the comments and feedback could be more sensitive. They felt that some of the comparisons that are made between people are not always helpful. “Evaluating people based on a micro project is not the point of Swadharma,” says Som.

Another issue that came up is the shallow introduction to many activities in Auroville. “Perhaps we can spend a little more time working at a place rather than merely listening to an introduction,” says Pranit. He feels that fewer activities with more depth might lead to better understanding.

The Swadharma programme ended on a high, but there has not been much follow up after the programme. The 2016 group feels there could be some system put in place to remind them of key ideas and reinforce the habits. I ended my conversation with a final question: “Imagine that before the programme you knew everything that you now know about Auroville and Swadharma; would you still enroll in it?” The answer was a unanimous ‘yes’.